An Apology to WF ....

My Dear Winefairie ....



I would like to apologize to you for the wrongs I have done to you of which I am aware.



I apologize for asking you and Catmadam to take your attacks on Bree off the Message Boards and into email. Apparently that was very offensive to you. I did not mean for it to be.



I apologize for then announcing to the people left on FP that you and Cat left because of me. Although I thought that to be the case, apparently my doing so made you extremely upset with me.



And I apologize for writing to 3 of your friends and asking them if they noticed or thought you were behaving differently from your normal self. I was not trying to smear you, honestly.



Congratulations on your new home. I hope it is going well.

Sincerely,

Cincin

I Did Something Stoopid ....

Given the online tensions I have experienced this year, I decided to run a Yahoo Search on my user name and see what it brought up. The results were good. My homepage ... my blogs ... various places I have posted comments, etc.

Then I got the "brilliant" idea to run a Yahoo Search on Winefairie. And that's where I found the inner circle of people who led to the downfall of Fool's Paradise.

Mind you, this "SparkPeople" group of "Lost Fools" .... as they called themselves (then they got angry if anyone else called them that) .... doesn't seem to have been very active since January of 2007 .... but it is the membership which is very telling. And I am not saying that Winefairie started this "SparkPeople" group ... in fact, it looks more like Q-Ball was the ring-leader there ... it was just my Yahoo Search for Winefaire which brought it up.

Now I know who the elite inner circle was. And who the rejected outcasts were. It is the middleschool lunch table thing all over again.

Now .... maybe some of the missing ladies were invited, but decided not to join? That is possible. Where is RH? Nunnie?? T4? Sparkle? LindaS? Sweeney?????? Belly? Sunshine? Looney? Knitnurse? Purpleangel? Skater? Sailor? Me?? Bree? Lilaz?

Or are these the people who made Fool's Paradise "No Fun" anymore and the reason Cat and WF and Caterry and Q-Ball stopped posting. Gilly and Do continued to play everywhere and tried to maintain friendships .... Swillow hadn't been around for quite awhile. Not sure why she left FP in the first place. And Sizz was playing both ends, it seems.

Well .... seeing all these faces and names of people who were once very dear to me made me sad and angry and a whole bunch of other emotions .... I do see that the group didn't seem to stay active for very long .... maybe they found somewhere else to go? Maybe Q-Ball did set up a message board and they are there?

But suffice to say that I wasn't invited to any of it. It appears I am among good company of un-invitees .... but still ..... pfffffffttttttt ....

And here I am thinking about trying to start a community in iVillage where ALL the old Fewls would feel welcome .... although there would be 2 Rules which all would have to follow ....

Rule #1 ..... BE NICE.
Rule #2 .... See Rule #1.

Welll ..... I am still going to attempt to start a community in iVillage. And if I can get it approved, I am still going to invite all people from SBDO-FP to join me there. Everyone will be welcome .... but the 2 Rules must be followed.

A full one-year membership to iVillage which blocks ads and pop-ups and allows full access to the Message Boards and all they offer is less than $40 a year. SBDO costs between $84-240 a year, depending on when you joined!! iVillage offers Diet and Health boards along with about a zillion other boards .... (phew ... the Love & Sex Boards have some real eye-opening topics!! Yikes!!) .... I have spent several months on these boards trying to get a feel for how they work ... meeting people .... visiting communities ... finding friends .... etc. When I opened a thread there several months ago about relocating Fewl's Paradise, I basically barged into someone's home and set up a camp in their living room!! I didn't realize at the time that is what I did .... but now I know that is what I did!! I apologize to members of the Laugh Yoursef Well/Coffee Shop Chatter Community!!!

When and if I do set up a community, it won't be in the diet and health area anyway! Although I do really like the titles of some of their communites!

New Comments Today ....

Here are some comments I got today on this Blog ... from Ms. Anonymous ... and if you check the Site meter you will see that whoever it was now has an "Anonymizer" which hides her IP address and location .... LOL ....

Thing is ... she just can't hide her attitude!!

Here is a compilation of today's posts from ONE person .... in the order they posted them ...

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Caterry's Gift to Me ....":
I love that saying. It's called humor. I don't think your friend meant anything mean by it. You seem to have a real chip on your shoulder. Lighten up and try to have a sense of humor and you might enjoy life more.

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "EVIL .....":
I feel really bad for you and wish you could quit dwelling on negatives.

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "What I did ....":
I stumbled upon this site by accident, but I'm getting the biggest kick out of you trying to figure everything out. A PI you are not. ha!

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Glass and Plants ...":
Looks cool out there. What all are you growing?

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Out of all of those comments ... I found the last one to be kind and friendly and I responded in kind.

The other comments just confuse me. Why is this person pretending like she doesn't know me? She spent around 1/2 an hour on my Blog ... reading 16 different pages .... this is someone invested in me somehow. I am fairly sure of who it is ... but given the lengths she has gone to hide her identity, I'll leave that be. However ... any other people who knew the members of Fool's Paradise, and who know me ... can probably guess who posted the comments above.

What amazes me is that they call me sad and miserable ... yet they continue to pursue me. It is fascinating!

Lord .... If I can't Be ....

Lord ... If I can't be Rich in $$, please let me be Rich in Friendships.

Lord ... If I can't be Witty, please surround me with people who laugh anyway!

Lord ... If I can't be Sane, please let my friends be Slightly Off-Kilter, too!

Lord ... If I can't cry when I need to, please let my friends tell me heart-wrenching things which MAKE me cry!

Lord ... If I am crying too much, please let my friends make me laugh until my sides hurt!

Lord ...

Caterry's Gift to Me ....

Back in November 2006, WF, Cat, Caterry, and Sunshine came to see me on a Saturday afternoon. Little tokens of friendship were exchanged ... Candles and magnets and keychains, etc.

Caterry's gift to me came with the statement ... "I hope this doesn't make you mad or hurt your feelings" .... Oh-OH! What sort of gift would do that?

Well the magnet she gave me had the little prayer "LORD, IF I CAN'T BE SKINNY, PLEASE LET MY FRIENDS BE FAT!"

Okay ... well ... 'tis true that I can't be skinny .... so I hung the magnet on my refrigerator .... shrugged my shoulders ... and went on. Caterry, by the way, is very tall (my height) and skinny, although she thinks herself to be overweight.

But the magnet caught my eye the other day ... and I got to thinking about my friends. Okay so most of my skin friends are overweight. La is not (NO, Really!! You are NOT) and Diana is not (and she eats!!) and Caroline looks great, and Sueann is skinny .... but all my other female friends and my spouse, and myself, and some of my friend's spouses are overweight. I'm sure our Drs classify some of us as "obese" ... some of us as "morbidly obese". So .... thanks for the magnet, Caterry ... it seems to speak true.

Then I thought about the women I met online .... on a Diet/Weightloss website, no less. They varied as much as my skin friends .... from Skinny ((Gilly .... Sweeney .... Caterry ...)) to morbidly obese ... ((that would be me and anyone bigger than me)) and all weights and sizes in between.

Do I like any of these women more or less because of their SIZE? Absolutely NOT. In fact, one of the most beautiful women I know has no idea how beautiful she is. She is overweight. Her hair is brown/black going to grey. She wears little, if any, make-up. Life has thrown her many, many sadnesses. Yet her laugh is a melody. Her smile, sunlight. her advice, wise. Her kindnesses many. And she really doesn't consider herself beautiful .... which is probably one of the most beautiful things about her!

I wonder what she thinks when she sees pictures of herself.

So .... Lord .... if I can't be skinny .... please let my friends be REAL.

It isn't about weight. It should never be about weight.

Tom's Glasswork ...

Glass and Plants ...

Tom is really enjoying doing stained glass projects ... here is what he did this weekend ...



And I am really enjoying growing things!! All I have to do is look at my deck and I feel happy ...

Cincin's Philosophies II .....

The sound of Cicadas in the trees is good for the Soul ...

The sound of Windchimes in the breeze is good for the Soul ...

The sound of a Water Feature nearby is good for the Soul ...

The taste of slightly sour lemonade on a hot summer day while sitting on the deck in dappled sunlight and listening to all of the above is very good for the Soul.

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Ha-Ha!! And it is football season!!! Yay!!

Go Broncos!!!

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Cats and Dogs and Pets in general are good for the Soul! Dogs who lay at your feet and cats who lay on your lap are Very Good for the Soul.

Riunite on ice .... very nice. Especially with pasta and garlic bread.

Nice emails from friends are good for the Soul.

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EVIL .....

Facing off against the Fellowship is the evil Saruman, once the head of the Council of the Wise, who has since succumbed to the dark temptations of Sauron’s power. Saruman wants Frodo’s ring and is willing to use his specially bred Uruk-Hai — grotesque, war-like creatures -- to get it. Perhaps no one could embody Saruman better than that long-time master, Christopher Lee. Lee had played many mythical creatures before but had never been involved with a project like The Lord of The Rings. "This is the outright creation of an entire world," he says. "It brings together history and languages and cultures and makes a dreamscape come true." Although Saruman lived around 7,000 mythical years ago, Lee sees his dark reflection all over the place in the modern world. "To my way of thinking, the evil that exists today isn’t that different from what you see in Middle-earth. People will always crave power and Saruman wants Sauron’s power," he explains. "To me, he is not just the physical force of evil personified, he is also very real."

From: http://www.lordoftherings.net/index_cast.html

So .... we are watching the LOTR's trilogy again ... on DVD. It is a wonderful story and was filmed magnificantly! As I am watching this I get a couple of email alerts that someone had commented on this BLOG. This masked commentator chose to comment on some old posts about Fool's Paradise on the South Beach Diet message boards. She claims to not know the people involved, but my guess is that she is lieing. My Site Meter shows her as being from Wilmington, Delaware ... but also lists her as being in the Central Time Zone. All that means is that her Internet Server is in Delaware ... but SHE is actually in the Central US. And I do not know for sure who she is ... but I am quite sure she knows of me and people involved in those posts. Her tone of ridicule comes through loud and clear ... and rings familiar.

So .... she brought back memories of things I continue to try to put behind me. But these things just happened a few months ago ... so their pain still lingers and pops up at unexpected times in me.

I am still trying to figure out why someone would want to take a "happy place" and turn it into a "dark mean nasty place". This theme pops up all the time in literature and movie and LIFE ... and I just don't get it.

But watching the LOTR last night brought home that it is mostly just about POWER. And the quote I copied above has parallels in MANY ways, as Christopher Lee commented. In my own little world it was the Fool's Paradise message board on the South Beach Diet thread which succumbed to the dark temptations of evil and power.

Saruman was once head of the Council of the Wise ... but that wasn't enough power for him ... he wants the one ring which rules all ... and he is willing to destroy friendships and kill innocents and yank huge strong trees from the ground and create evil creatures to do his bidding .... just so he can RULE ALL. Never mind that the ALL that he wants to rule is ugly and injured and limping along in fear.

And there is the evil eye of Sauron watching over everything and sending his negative energy out, pulling in the weak and spineless. And sometimes the weak and the spineless were actually people who ruled parts of Middle-Earth. People who had the power to STOP him, but chose instead to join him ... so tempting the lure of POWER ... and so terrifying the threat of becoming his target.

Gee what parallels could I draw from all that? Where do WF and the Cats and Q and the Admins all fit into the picture? Where do I fit in? Where do all the other members of FP fit in?

Does FP even exist now?? I wonder.

Thank You J.K. Rowling!!

I feel so very lucky to have been alive during the Harry Potter phenomenon. I also feel blessed to have had a son who was the perfect age when the first books came out.

In 1999 I was a single mother of a 10 year old son. I do not remember where or when I first started hearing about the Harry Potter books .... but the 3rd book, The Prisoner of Azkaban was coming out with much ado in the media and I had not yet read the first two books! According to Amazon.com I ordered all three books at the same time in October of 1999.

I was hooked with the first chapter of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. I devoured the first three books .... and talked my 10 year old son into reading The Sorcerer's Stone after me. He was not much into reading at the time. But what do you know?? The Sorcerer's Stone sucked him in, too! And if I have nothing else to thank J.K. Rowling for, which I do, I am immensely thankful to her for writing the first book which pulled my child into the wonderful world of reading!

At family gatherings for Christmas 1999 we found out that my nieces and nephews were also reading the Harry Potter books .... as well as their parents!! That encouraged my son, Robbie, to keep reading the next two books ... The Chamber of Secrets and The Prisoner of Azkaban. I remember being amazed at these 10 year old children who were eagerly devouring a 435 page book .... and then talking to each other about them! And the adults were all talking about these books, too! And the adults were talking to the kids and the kids were talking to the adults and everyone was talking about Harry Potter. And everybody was eagerly awaiting the next novel.

Also in late 1999 I met the man who would later become my husband. He was a reader, too, and he was also reading the Harry Potter books. A 45 year old man reading Harry Potter! In fact, it was his sister-in-law who finally told me how to pronounce Hermione's name correctly!! She and her husband and son were all reading them, too. It seemed everyone was reading Harry Potter and I found that to be amazing.

In July 2000 Harry Potter 4 ... The Goblet of Fire came out and I made the mistake of only buying ONE copy!! OH MY!! I immediately had to go out and buy another copy so that Robbie and I could both read the book at the same time! Thank goodness it was summer so that it didn't get in the way of schoolwork! His nor mine nor my students'!! This book was 734 pages long and kids everywhere were racing through it! Robbie kept wanting to talk about it as we were reading it ... I was always chapters behind him and this frustrated him to no end! But we would discuss the parts I had covered already, and he never failed to notice things I hadn't noticed, and offered me insights I hadn't thought about. My 11 year old and I were reading the same book and talking about it! Enjoying it!!

By the time Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix came out, in July of 2003, Tom and I had been married for two years and I was wise enough to order 3 copies from Amazon.com .... which were delivered to our door on the day it came out.

The first and second Harry Potter movies had already been in theaters and they had put a face and a vision to all that was Harry Potter. None of the movies were as good as the books .... but they were still amazing creations. The actors and actresses were PERFECTLY casted. The movies were a visual treat!

The Order of the Phoenix was 870 pages long and was the darkest and my least favorite of the Harry Potter novels. Yet .... because we were reading it in July of 2003, the orange kitten we took in at that time is now our cat named Weasley .... after Ron .... and the other carrot-headed Weasleys. We call him Weasel for short ... and it fits him. This time it was Tom and Robbie and I all reading the book at the same time ... all checking with each other to see what chapter who was on ... and discussing the parts we all had read. None of us liked the 5th book much. It was well written and well done ..... and necessary to the story overall ... but none of us liked seeing evil move in and take over the way it did in Book 5.

Robbie was 13 in July of 2003 ... and the Harry Potter books were not coming out fast enough for him. He asked us for books to read. He wondered if we knew of other books, similar to Harry Potter, which we thought he might enjoy. Enter The Narnia Series of books by C.S. Lewis. Enter Philip Pullman and the Dark Materials Trilogy. Enter the books Eragon and Eldest by Christopher Paolini. Enter Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkein. Enter Terry Goodkind's Sword of Truth series ....

I have a son who loves to read! And so many young people his age have found reading ... and the main person we have to thank for all this is J. K. Rowling. It also doesn't hurt that I love to read and that our home is full of bookshelves which are full of all kinds of books. Tom and I both always have a book near our side. But J.K. Rowling and Harry Potter got Robbie into reading at a much younger age and he has never been afraid to pick up a 1,000 page book.

Robbie has also learned how much better a book is compared to the movie based on the book. We all love the Harry Potter movies .... but none have been better than their book. Speaking of which .... I am also glad to have been living during the time of the fantastic filming of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. The books were still better .... but what an amazing cinematic achievement the movies were! So here's an aside "Thank You" to Peter Jackson for bringing those wonderful books to life on the big screen in such a fantastic way!

Book 6 ... Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince came out in July 2005. Here is an added thanks to J.K. Rowling and her publishers for making sure the 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th books all came out in July!! How else could everyone get them read so quickly? It was perfect for students and teachers with summers off! I can't imagine having to teach a classroom full of teenagers the day after a Harry Potter book was released! We would have had to throw away our lesson plans and just let everybody read! A good thing for an English class ... but I teach Math!

Anyway ... once again, I ordered 3 copies of Book 6 from Amazon ... and once again, they were on our doorstep the day of the release. Once again we all read the books at the same time and discussed the parts we all had read. I liked book 6 much better than book 5 ... but I did not want Dumbledore to be dead. And I had so hoped that Snape was actually a good guy. Book 6 left us with lots of clues and questions. It was a perfect set-up for the 7th and final book. Now all we had to do was re-read the first 6 books and WAIT.

July 2007 finally rolled around and it was to be a Harry Potter Bonanza Month!! First came the movie .... Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. The cast from the 1st movie was still intact (except for Dumbledore) and Harry and Ron and Hermione, along with all the other teenage actors, were all aging with their characters. Who would have thought that Ron would be taller than Harry?

Anyway ... Tom and Robbie and I went to see The Order of the Phoenix at the Studio Movie Grill in Lewsiville. Numerous families were in attendance with us. I particularly noticed a young boy, probably age 10 or 11, sitting with his father a few seats down from us. As the previews were playing there was one particular preview which caught my attention and as I was watching it, I wondered what book it was based on and how I could have missed reading such a wonderful book. I asked Robbie if he recognized the preview as being from a book? The preview made the movie look like it was going to be wonderful (although I cannot for the life of me remember the name of the movie) and I kept thinking how I needed to get ahold of the book before that movie came out. At the end of that preview, and before the next one started, I heard the young boy near us say to his father, "I want the book!"

"I want the book!" Words which came out of the mouth of a 10 or 11 year old boy while sitting in a movie theater. The very same words that Tom and Robbie and I all happened to be thinking, too! Not "I want to see that movie!" but "I want the book!" I have been searching the web for links to movie previews to try to find what movie it was previewing and to see if I could find the book ... but it looks like I may have to go see The Order of the Phoenix again, just to find out what that preview was! (If anybody reading this blog knows what it was, please let me know!)

Side note: I think it might have been "The Spiderwick Chronicles"?

Anyway ... The Order of the Phoenix was very well done. Keep in mind, this was my least favorite book, so I was a little bit worried about the movie. Evil Umbridge was well casted and played. She did not look like a toad, as she was described in the book, but it made her evil seem even worse because it was coming from this pleasant looking woman. ((Hmmmm .... reminds me of some ex-friends of mine.))

Finally on Saturday July 21, 2007, the 7th and final Harry Potter book arrived on our doorstep .... once again in triplicate. Harry Potter and Deathly Hallows swept the world. Robbie, now 17, was the first to dig in. Tom and I soon followed and the silence in our home was amazing. We were each in our own little Harry Potter inspired world, and quite happy to be there! We did have the British Open on the TV on Sunday and the commentators mentioned more than once the number of people they saw in the crowds who were actually reading the Harry Potter book in between the action on the course! And in our home there were actually a couple of evenings when the television set didn't even come on! That is unheard of around here (sadly).

SPOILER ALERT .... don't read if you don't want to know what happens in the last pages of the last book.

I think each of us who read the last book slowed down as we neared the end. As various beloved characters died, a sadness began to set in. Then it became clear that Harry himself was going to die in this last book. But yet, his death seemed right. The only way to stop the spread of evil was for Harry to willingly go to his death. In fact, it seemed a decidedly Christian sacrifice that Harry was being asked to make, a sacrifice he was willing to offer. A sacrifice I was going to have trouble reading ... but which I totally understood. And Harry did die. Harry was killed by Voldemort. Harry also lived again and in the end, good conquered all. But not without loss of friends and family. The book ends with a last chapter set 19 years later, when Harry is 36. He is married. He has children. Same for Ron and Hermione. Hogwarts still exists, and their children attend.

SPOILER OVER ....

Thank you, J.K. Rowling, for creating Harry Potter and all that he has become. Thank you for writing books which children of all ages could enjoy. Thank you for writing books which adults can discuss over a beer and children can discuss on the playground and families can discuss over dinner. And thank you for enriching my son's life from age 10 to 17 ... he grew up while Harry grew up. You have many wonderful lessons entwined throughout your books which I hope Robbie has picked up on .... many I KNOW he has picked up on.

I could go on and on ... I already have ... but one more time ... THANK YOU, J.K. ROWLING!